Social Soliloquy
by James Menges
Synopsis
A digital rendition of Hamlet’s soliloquy “To be or not to be” performed as a contemporary group text chat.
Staging Notes
This is an experimental play with a dance element. There is only one spoken line in the play, at the very end. All other lines, which appear to be delivered by the actors on their cell phones, can be done off-stage by crew using a computer to upload each dialog line as per the methods adopted for the production. A different colored balloon or back fill around each line of dialog as well as font selection will distinguish the characters from each other and add to their personality. The actors will be unencumbered dancers holding cell phones. Choreographed movements and music will add to the performance.
Potential Staging Options
Projection –
The lines will appear projected on a screen, probably above the actors,
On Monitors –
The lines will appear on large monitors positioned vertically, like standing cell phones, on each side of the stage so the audience can clearly see them.
Via Internet –
In a change to usual theater protocol, audience members will not be asked to turn off their phones, but will be invited to log into a website so they can follow the action on their cell phones; or potentially even distract themselves by linking to the hashtags and adding comments.
In addition to the texting of dialog, at the top of the monitors and cell phones could be a live feed of a wide angle shot of the stage. A wireless network should be set up in the theater. There are several platforms available for streaming the production.
Characters
HAMLET Hamlet with his Act III Sc:1 soliloquy
SIDEKICK overbearing friend that tries to interpret Hamlet
BRANDY non-Hero self-centered influencer
SNARKY agitator that argues against everyone
KARMA the influence of Buddha Karma thought
AKRON communicates only in acronyms (defines acronym)
Suggested Font and Color
HAMLET Old English, Red
SIDEKICK Courier New, Pink
BRANDY Comic Sans, Yellow
SNARKY Eras Bold, Green
KARMA Lucinda Handwriting, Purple
AKRON Arial, Blue
Scene
A contemporary social media group chat.
Time
Now
Setting
The wide-open space where social media physically takes place. Three chairs sit in the middle of the stage.
At Rise HAMLET sits in the middle chair, SIDEKICK, BRANDY, SNARKY, KARMA and AKRON walk around the stage totally focused on their phones. They ignore each other’s presence, negotiating around each other, in front of and behind HAMLET. The actors carry on like this through the entire play, using the chairs and phones as props for their dance.
HAMLET
To be, or not to be:
BRANDY
To be what?
SNARKY
Is that your question?
HAMLET
That is the question.
AKRON
? (I have a question)
SIDEKICK
THE question!
SNARKY
What to be?
KARMA
Or what to be void of?
SIDEKICK
To EXIST.
BRANDY
I am my brand. #Iammybrand #myawesomebrand #brandme
HAMLET
Whether ‘tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
BRANDY
Trolls are outrageous. They crowd my space. #trollssuck #notrollarea
SNARKY
Outrageous fortune leads to suffering.
KARMA
All life is suffering.
AKRON
AAMOF LFU (As A Matter Of Fact; Life’s Fucked Up)
SIDEKICK
In one’s mind — a MORAL decision — trials and attacks of DESTINY. A decision TO BE made.
BRANDY
Don’t be so AGGRESSIVE. Give us some space. TXS. #chilloutdude #givemespace #backoffjack
HAMLET
or take arms against a sea of troubles,
SIDEKICK
To fight against the forces of endless suffering.
BRANDY
All this talk of war makes me uncomfortable. #weareone #chilloutdude #badvibes
AKRON
IOW sux (In Other Words; sucks)
KARMA
A decision to end such troubles; is only a new beginning.
SNARKY
A misguided decision lost in privilege; or false expectations.
HAMLET
and by opposing end them? (beat) To die; To sleep;
BRANDY
2d4 (To Die For) Café Blue peach cobbler. #mycobblersin #todiefor #dietonhold
AKRON
RUS LOL DBD (Are You Serious; Laughing Out Loud; Don’t be Dumb)
SIDEKICK
It’s a fight against the INNER DEMONS.
SNARKY
Or a fight side by the side with the devil.
KARMA
To act against oneself will not end the trouble. You must act with oneself.
HAMLET
No more; and by a sleep to say we end the heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks
SIDEKICK
To finish it all; to be no more. ESCAPE the heart-ache and PAIN of uncertainty.
SNARKY
Is this a viable solution?
AKRON
WFM (Works For Me)
BRANDY
I sleep when I am depressed. #deepdarksleep #darkinsomnia #sleepitoff
KARMA
We do not know what is next, but we know it is influenced by now. Rebirth is hard to escape.
HAMLET
that flesh is heir to, ‘tis a consummation;
SIDEKICK
Duty that goes along with being human.
KARMA
To die by one’s own hand? Not so.
SNARKY
An escape from one’s mind – fight against destiny.
BRANDY
My destiny is to be in the cloud. #brandintheclouds #cloudsinmyhead #cloudybrand #clouddestiny
HAMLET
devoutly to be wish’d. To die, to sleep;
SIDEKICK
To DIE and thus to SLEEP
SNARKY
Arrival at one’s death.
AKRON
SOL DOA SWAK (Shit Out of Luck; Dead On Arrival; Sealed With A Kiss)
BRANDY
Sleep like a rock. #benedrylsleep #deepdarksleep #rockmysleep
HAMLET
To sleep; perchance to dream: ay, there’s the rub;
SNARKY
When you dream, you are alive.
KARMA
The conscious mind lives.
SIDEKICK
But to see this AFTERLIFE brings unknown PROBLEMS.
AKRON
BFP (Big Fucking Problem)
HAMLET
For in that sleep of death what dreams may come
SIDEKICK
For in death’s sleep, what WILL WE SEE?
SNARKY
Death is sleep – dreams are real.
KARMA
Rebirth will grow from your current intentions.
BRANDY
Is there an app for that?
AKRON
IDK WDYC (I Don’t Know; Why Do You Care)
HAMLET
When we have shuffled off this mortal coil,
KARMA
It’s how you do it; the connected intentions.
SIDEKICK
Leave our mortal bodies of turmoil and CONFUSION.
SNARKY
And head to an eternity that might be worse.
AKRON
B3 meh (Blah, Blah, Blah; who cares, whatever)
HAMLET
must give us pause; there’s the respect that makes calamity of so long life;
SIDEKICK
That which makes our life so UNBEARABLE.
KARMA
Reasons, motives, (beat) INTENTIONS
SNARKY
Stop and consider.
HAMLET
For who would bear the whips and scorns of time, The oppressor’s wrong, the proud man’s contumely,
SIDEKICK
Who wants to suffer the wrongs of oppression?
KARMA
It’s not a choice. It’s Life.
AKRON
BMW LABATYD (Bitch Moan Whine; Life’s A Bitch And Then You Die)
BRANDY
It’s a Lifestyle. Click to choose. #clickyrlife #myphonezombielifestyle #clickbuy #phonezombie
SNARKY
Threatened abuse against one’s self does not compare.
HAMLET
The pangs of disprized love, the law’s delay, the insolence of office and the spurns
SNARKY
A gripe against those who hold public office
BRANDY
Vote against them all. #votethemout #voteconflict #vetothem
AKRON
AFAIC DKDC (As Far As I’m Concerned; Don’t Know Don’t Care)
HAMLET
that patient merit of the unworthy takes, when he himself might his quietus make
SIDEKICK
The patience of the UNWORTHY SOUL when he might kill himself.
SNARKY
Bearing evil with calmness
KARMA
To settle a debt with another, to release one’s self from life
HAMLET
with a bare bodkin? who would fardels bear, to grunt and sweat under a weary life,
SIDEKICK
Who wants to suffer life when it is so easy to end one’s troubles.
KARMA
You would bare that burden at rebirth.
BRANDY
Like Karma. I ♥ (heart) karma. #karmarocks #Ilovekarma #karmacausesit
AKRON
CWOT IYKWIM (Complete Waste Of Time; If You Know What I Mean)
HAMLET
But that the dread of something after death,
SIDEKICK
The fear of what becomes AFTER DEATH.
SNARKY
That fear of the unknown – to act or remain inactive?
KARMA
If you have good intentions in life, no need to fear the next life.
AKRON
KMN YOLO (Kill Me Now; You Only Live Once)
BRANDY
You’re so negative. #helpmenow #stopnegativevibes #punchpositive #vibeboostneeded #goodkarmaneeded
HAMLET
the undiscover’d country from whose bourn no traveler returns, puzzles the will
SIDEKICK
To delve into death’s unknown, for which NO ONE ever RETURNS,
SNARKY
Death is a one way journey.
KARMA
If you are so fortunate. For most of us, there will be another opportunity.
AKRON
TCB (Trouble Came Back)
HAMLET
and makes us rather bear those ills we have than fly to others that we know not of? thus conscience does make cowards of us all;
SIDEKICK
Consciousness will make COWARDS of us all. Why do miserable people continue to live?
KARMA
We should be thankful.
SNARKY
Because the devil we know may be better than the one we do not?
KARMA
Because thoughts can deter action.
BRANDY
Thoughts cause action. Click to buy. #clickbuy #clickforaction #clicktobuy #buymybrand
AKRON
ACD BSOD (Alt Control Delete, Blue Screen Of Death)
HAMLET
and thus the native hue of resolution is sicklied o’er with the pale cast of thought
SIDEKICK
A DETERMINATION caught off by an affliction of thought.
SNARKY
Unwholesome thought with natural resolve.
KARMA
Thought that consequences derailed.
HAMLET
and enterprises of great pith and moment with this regard their currents turn awry,
SIDEKICK
ACTIONS of great consequences disrupted by the focus put on them
AKRON
BTW NGH (By The Way; Not Gonna Happen)
SNARKY
Lost in the contemplation.
HAMLET
and lose the name of action.
(HAMLET sits back down in a chair in the center of the stage.)
SIDEKICK
Too much thought of important ACTIONS can PARALYZE us.
AKRON
ITA TMI (I Totally Agree; Too Much Information)
SNARKY
Too much phone without any thought is paralyzing us.
KARMA
Thought without proper intentions condemns us.
BRANDY
My thought is in my hand. #myphoneismylife #phonepriority #braininmyhand #phonezombieslive
(HAMLET, who has been sitting, stands up, holds his cell phone out to his side, arms-length, and drops the cell phone like a singer dropping the mic. All other actors stop and fall to the ground when the phone hits the floor. A sole spotlight illuminates HAMLET. For the first time in the play, HAMLET speaks out loud.)
HAMLET
To be, or not to be: that is the question.
(Lights out)
END OF PLAY
This story originally appeared in Stonecoast Review Issue 17.
Photo by Jack Sharp